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Oct 12, 2008
Significant Others

Relationships as we know them in this lifetime are officially over. First thing is, No this is not spurred on by anything besides the fact that I was staring at the wall thinking; so don’t infer anything from this. Now on to business; in the world of the “21st century digital boy” and the internet highway known as the World Wide Web. Although it would seem to appear as if stuff like this would be made easier its actually in fact a lot more difficult then it used to be. In the early 90’s there was this slogan on some commercial that was like “everyone an individual, no two people are the same” or some dumb shit like that and now that I think about it, it makes sense. People are so different in all facets of life, that we all just completely despise each other. They say nobody’s perfect and everyone has flaws but if we’re talking getting married to someone,( you know, TIL DEATH TIL YOU PART!) then for me at least, that person is really going to need to be pretty fucking close to perfect. Yes everyone has flaws; just don’t let me see them. How can anyone even meet people anymore when all we do as a society is socially network? Yea let me go to match.com and fill out a profile; I’ll defiantly find the “one for me”. By “one for me” I actually mean “one for me” to divorce in a year and a half. Or maybe, “one for me” to get beat up, robbed and raped by. How would I know, all I see is a picture and a few sentences. And can someone explain to me what speed dating is what’s up with it? What’s that like you sit for five minutes with someone and see if there the “one” for you? And you like have a bell you hit when you think its not working? Well it’s defiantly better then wasting time thinking of interesting things to put in a profile, but still seems like a little to much pressure for me. Unless the first words out of this chicks mouth are “you wanna go get high?”, I really doubt I’m interested. I’d be ringing the bell every five seconds fuck five minutes. “Oh really, you’re a god fearing woman?.... DING!!!. Have a nice day-”. Or maybe a set of tits I can’t refuse, like when you see Jennifer Tilly on those late night poker shows. Where do they have speed dating anyway? How much is it, can I participate? That would be a hell of a blog. I would love to see how many women skip over my table. They’d see me and be like “you know what, I need to go freshen up..” then proceed to pry open the bathroom window, jump out and like never come back. That would be fun times. But it’s not even like you could random start up conversation with someone because everyone, including myself who would happen to be at a bus stop or walking are listening to an iPod most of the time. I love the bus for that simple fact, my iPod time. And with the death of the “High school sweethearts” scenarios, there’s really nothing else to bank on. I don’t know how any of you met each other, but your either fucking weird, or you hate the persons guts but stay with them because your afraid of not having a relationship. Either way, you’re all fucking miserable, and to that… cheers, because misery(me) just happens to love company!!!!

Posted at 09:07 pm by JayPorks

 

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